I am so excited with everyone's feedback on the column. In all honesty, writing other than on here is new to me. I am a terrible at spelling and my grammar is atrocious. So when I got the phone call saying I had got the job with the Sunday Tele I was thrilled. I was excited for a number of reasons
1. I wanted to show a new side to rugby league that the public doesn't often get to see
2. I wanted to share my voice and opinions with the larger public
3. I wanted to be more than a talking head
4. I wanted a challenge
So once the excitement subsided then I was full of fear.
Who am I to write a column? People are going to laugh at me, hate me, put me down. How will I be interesting every single week and the life long issue of "will they like me"?
I decided to go onto my twitter and see what people thought of my first column "No Drugs and No Botox" was the headline.
I was sick to the stomach when I read that a journo from a different publication put me down and my first attempt at writing a column.
I felt like a failure. Why did I even need to know what other people thought? Why was I searching for approval?
I guess that's the human condition..
After the 50 nice comments and 3 rude comments I made a decision to never read those negative comments again.
Not because they're not valid. Everyone is allowed their opinion but because my reaction to them was so unhealthy, I still need my skin to get a little thicker before I read how "dumb, futile and boring" I am.
I remembered what I needed in my day-to-day life to feel grounded and centred and reading Peoples awful comments wasn't one of them.
Scrutiny.
How do those footy players do it?
How do celebs do it? Paparazzi parking outside their homes, waiting to get a shot of them picking out a wedgie!
Horrendous..
I am really grateful to all of you that appreciate the work and those of you who read it and don't like it, I just appreciate the fact that you read it. I am a true skimmer when reading so if you managed even half of the article, I take it as a compliment!
xxxxx
